Tool No 4: Take Up Space
HOW? While standing up, make the distance between your elbows greater, and hold your hands further out from your body. Think “wingspan” rather than “waist measurement”. Making your presence felt by using your arms like this is a discreet, yet elegant and effective way of making an impact. I call it silent power.
Many people are at their most comfortable when their personal space starts and ends close to the body. They feel most at ease with their forearms touching the side of their body and their hands folded in front of their stomach.
This was certainly the case for Ulrik, a partner in a large Danish consultancy firm. He told me that he found it difficult to speak up at meetings. Ulrik isn’t very tall, and to compound matters, he would slouch in his chair. He lacked silent power.
We worked on getting him to take up more space at partner meetings. When standing up, I wanted him to open up his body by increasing the distance between his elbows. When sitting down, I wanted him to reach his hands across the table, to create more distance between his hands and his navel. It worked. He later told me that once he started to take up more space, he found it easier to contribute at meetings.
